Decision & Faith

June 1, 2001

How Vision, Decision, and Faith Orchestrated Events for “Leap of Faith“.

I enrolled in a French class. I examined my financial situation and determined that, if I leased my house for enough to cover the costs on it, I could manage for a year or so without working. I could just relax in France and see what answers would bubble up in that old eight-ball. I consulted Jim and Brandon. Brandon, who was just graduating middle school, salivated at the idea of living in France for a year. Jim was a at career crossroads himself, and declared his willingness to follow my lead. Now to my ex. After a few discussions, Bob generously put aside his desire to be with his son in order to give Brandon a “once-in-a-lifetime opportunity.”

Nearly miraculous solutions materialized to solve the lingering problems. I leased my treasured house to people I knew and trusted. They just showed up at the door with a real estate agent, not previously knowing it was my house. Bob acquiesced to take possession of our elderly dog and the other dog made friends with strangers who wanted to keep her. Using the Internet, we finally found a suitable temporary apartment in Paris. As each hurdle fell away I felt reassured, and I faintly recognized the work of some other hand in this process.

Soon only my fear stood in the way. Fear of the unknown. Fears of unemployment, of not having a 99-year plan, of not knowing where this adventure would lead me. Fears about whether it would be a mistake, whether I was being crazy and irresponsible, whether I could manage without an income in a foreign world. I had done all the analysis and preparation I could. I went to the edge of the light I could see.

I came to understand the profundity of the clichà “Leap of Faith.” I stood at the edge of a cliff, trying to decide whether to step off, whether to trust that a net would appear (as I once heard faith defined). I projected far into the future, and realized that whatever happened, at age 90 I was unlikely to look back and say, “I wish I hadn’t gone to France for a year.” By contrast, I already had regrets for opportunities I had failed to pursue in my younger years.

I closed my eyes and jumped.

Posted by Debra Bruce | Filed Under Articles by Debra Bruce, Just for Fun, Legal Career Change, Transition from Lawyer to Coach 

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